Be Yourself. Entertaining doesn't have to be expensive.
Since we recently moved to a new city, we’ve squeezed a lot of activity into our lives in a short amount of time. We love living in our new city (St. Louis), and because we love it so much, we’ve tried to experience everything St. Louis has to offer. When people ask us how things have been going, we joke that we’ve just been “living our rock and roll lifestyle.”
We’ve enjoyed our time here, but one of the problems is – trying to experience everything all at once can be expensive. On top of that, we’ve been entertaining a fair amount. People have regularly been coming into town, and we have the very natural desire to show them all of our favorite things. Also expensive. Here are some thoughts on how to do stay reasonable when you have guests:
1. Prioritize your activies. It’s okay to splurge on a couple of things if they’re really great. But choose wisely. Base your splurge on what your guests want to do the most. If they’re the kind of people who value going to some hip little bistro – then do that instead of hitting the show (concert, play, whatever) du jour. Don’t push what you think is the best thing to do. If you’re like me, it’s important to you that your guests have a good time. If you think there’s something they’ll really enjoy, then tell them about it, but don’t push. Give them a degree of control, even though I’m sure you know better than they do;)
2. Scope out the best free things in your area. In St. Louis, there’s a plethora of things that are both fun and free. If you’re already living a fairly frugal life, you’ll already know what they are. Be creative. Go pick apples. If you live in a city, scope out all the festivals going on at various times of the year. If not, figure out what’s going on where you live and try to coordinate visits with those things. A simple Google search is likely to give you some nice ideas/results as well.
3. It’s not where you are or what you’re doing, it’s who you’re with. If you have guests for multiple nights – make sure you spend some time at home. They’re in town to see you, not all the glamorous things about where you live. Cook dinner together at home. Buy a $5 bottle of wine from Trader Joe’s. Hit the local farmer’s market. People love farmer’s markets. They’re all a little different and they tend to have at least a couple of quirks that are unique to the city. Plus, the vegetables, fruits and meats at the farmer’s market tend to be fresh and delicious.
4. Don’t feel like you have to pick up every tab. When you have guests, it’s tempting to try to pay for everything. It’s unnecessary. People can handle going dutch. It’s a nice gesture, but don’t put your pocket book at risk just so you can feel like a good host. No one expects you to buy everything. College aged or younger siblings might be the exception.
5. As with public speaking or writing – know your audience. With number 4 in mind…don’t take them somewhere more expensive than they would have chosen themselves, either. Don’t take a couple of 22 year olds with entry level jobs to a 5 star restaurant and then saddle them with half the tab. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I’ve been there.
6. Finally, be honest. If you don’t want to spend too much or do certain things that cost money because you prefer to live a fairly frugal existence, it’s okay to say that. I don’t know anyone worth entertaining that doesn’t respect honesty.
With the exception of number 5, these are all rules that I frequently violate when I have guests. It’s something that I was reflecting about when I sat down in front of the computer tonight, and voila, you get this post – based on all the things I’m not very good at. Hopefully you’ll find something with some level of value in there. In any case, thanks for reading.
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#1 by Susan on October 5th, 2009 - 6:44 pm
Love your frugal entertaining tips! I think it’s a great idea to give guests a list of choices before they arrive so that both you and they know what kind of financial commitment they’re in for. And you’re right – people tend to over-schedule visits, when hanging out with a bottle of wine is usually the most fun.
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Todd Metheny Reply:
October 5th, 2009 at 7:21 pm
Hi Susan! Thanks for the input. Love your blog – especially how you name your characters! Honored to have an entertaining expert weigh in on the post!
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